Over the years, I have struggled with how to deal with my feelings. Whenever sadness, anger, or frustration rose within me, I really didn’t know how to deal with them. So, I simply suppressed them — not the world’s best idea!

I was always searching for the tools to deal with my feelings, but never found anything that clicked. Until one day, I came up with “The Pity Party Dance Off.”

The Pity Party Dance Off allows you to experience feelings fully and then let them go.

Here Is How It Works:

Step 1: Whenever a feeling arises, immediately allow yourself to feel it. Go into a private room:  the bathroom, the stock room at your work, a broom closet, or your home’s pantry. Any private spot will do just fine. Anywhere you will be alone and can fully express yourself.

Step 2: Once you enter the room, put a ten-to-fifteen-minute (depending on the severity of your feelings) timer on your phone.

Step 3: Once the timer starts, allow yourself to express fully exactly how you are feeling in the moment. Maybe you need to cry, scream into a pillow, punch the air vigorously, jump up and down, shake out your entire body, or simply sit in complete stillness and just breathe deeply.

Please note: You will intuitively know exactly what to do in that moment.

Step 4: Fully feel and express yourself until the timer goes off.

Step 5: Once the timer goes off and you have fully allowed yourself to feel exactly what it is you needed to feel, repeat this to yourself:

 [Insert name], I love you and you are safe. You can now let this go and move on. 

Step 6: Then, play your favourite soundtrack on your phone. I love Rihanna’s “Shine Bright Like a Diamond” (it always makes me feel like a superstar!) or Katy Perry‘s “Roar”. Dance your heart out. Bonus points if you sing along as loudly as you possibly can. This will instantly snap you out of your funk.

I personally have found this to be the best technique for allowing myself to quickly move through feelings and not have a week/month-long pity party for myself like I used to. Let’s face it: Shit is always going to come up in our lives. But this technique allows you to fully feel it, shake it off, and then let it go.

So the next time a feeling rises within you, have a Pity Party Dance Off and feel the difference it makes inside you. Tell me in the comments below — Does shaking it all off appeal to you? And what is your favourite track to bust out to?

Thank you so much for sharing your comment. Let’s all help create a kick-ass “Pity Party Dance Off” playlist!