Those of you who have read Mastering Your Mean Girl will know that I believe money is energy! It’s simply something we use as a form of exchange for other things that we value. I believe money will show up for that which is true for you and I also believe that you are not defined by the number on your bank statement or on your credit card bill. But I haven’t always thought this way. You see, back in 2010 when I hit rock bottom and ended up in hospital, I realised I was living my life out of fear. I realized I was entertaining many limiting fear-based Mean Girl beliefs because I didn’t know there was any other way.
My Mean Girl was telling me…
Money is hard to come by.
You have to come from a rich family to make it in life.
I am never going to get out of debt.
I am never going to be able to afford the type of dream home and life I desire.
I am always going to struggle financially.
And on and on she went.
But back in 2010, I realised that I was holding onto my parents’ philosophy around money and that all those fear based beliefs weren’t actually mine. You see, my parents didn’t come from abundance. My dad migrated to Australia from Italy with his family when he was 6 years old and they struggled! Dad had to leave school at 15 and get a job to help provide for his family. Mum too! When they had their first baby — my sister — they were still living at my Nonna’s place because they couldn’t afford their own home. They both worked extremely hard and incredibly long hours to provide my brother, sister and I with a different experience to what they had.
My mum is a nurse and when we were growing up, she worked night duty so that she could take the three of us to school and to all our after-school activities. She would work all night from 10 p.m. ‘til 6 a.m., get home, iron our uniforms, make our lunches, then do the school drop-off (to three different schools, I might add). She would then come home and sleep from around 9 a.m. ‘til 2:30 p.m., then it was back in the car to pick us all up and drop my sister to tutoring, me to dancing, and my brother to rugby practice. Most times she would sleep in the car whilst I was in dance class, because she was too tired to drive home then come back out again. Bless her! After our activities, it was home for a beautiful meal she had somehow found the time to prepare, followed by homework, then bed. If she was lucky, she could sneak in a few more hours of sleep on the couch from 7:30 p.m. ‘til 8:30 p.m. before it was time to head to work again. I remember how exhausted she always was. I remember her falling asleep at every opportunity she got. Sometimes she would even doze off for a minute or two when we were stopped at the traffic lights on the way home from dancing — she would get me to wake her when the light turned green… She truly has the soul of a warrior!
All this hustling, however, led me to believe not only that you had to work extremely hard, but that you had to flog your body in the process, just to make a buck. Mum and Dad hustled their hearts out, and this planted a seed in my mind that that’s ‘just what you have to do’… even if it’s at the detriment of your own health and happiness.
When I realised that I was still clutching onto this belief, I decided to master my Mean Girl and reprogram my beliefs around money. I now believe that…